The first weekend

 It is amazing to me how a space you didn't even know existed in your heart can be filled so quickly; and how once it is filled, being separated from that which filled it can feel like the greatest void.

Last weekend was absolutely amazing.  We met with the boys' team and had the opportunity to ask questions and learn more about these kiddos.  We established the transition plan and then got into the specifics of how the weekend would unfold.  We arranged to meet the boys with their caseworker at a park later that afternoon.  

The drive to the park felt like the drive to the hospital when you are in labor - only the contractions in my stomach were butterflies anxiously fluttering around.  We got there a little early and they got there a little late so it felt like the longest wait before their caseworker's vehicle pulled up.  They got out and stuck close by her as they walked our way.  She introduced us and they politely shook our hands before they ran off to play.  I was so grateful for their sake that we had met at a place that allowed them to escape the awkwardness that I am sure they felt.  I felt a nervous anxiousness, I can't imagine how they were feeling!

We spent a couple hours at the park and as the time went on, the boys began to warm up to us.  By the end, the oldest was asking questions a mile a minute, wondering what his new house was going to be like, what kind of toys he would have, if he would get to have a birthday party... all the things that are important to a 6 year old.  The younger two were giggly, interactive, and sweet.  We left the park with plans to pick them up at daycare the next morning.

The next day we picked them up at 10 and had them until 5.  We got them each a little gift bag with some car tape and cars, a mask, a little imaginink coloring book, a themed straw cup, and their own copy of the book I wrote. They saw the gift bags right when we got into the hotel room and opened them, thanking us for each item (which they would continue to do many times over the weekend).  We enjoyed the pool, a pb & j lunch in the room, and playing with all the toys we brought from home - like half the toys we own!

The very most heartwarming part of the day was when the oldest casually asked,
"Hey mom, why is the pool cold?"  
I'm not sure what answer I gave because I was too busy melting over being called mom!

 It was a great day overall and 5:00 rolled around far too quickly.  They went home with their provider with plans of coming back on Saturday. 

We picked them up on Saturday morning and visited for a while at their place before heading back to the hotel.  We spent another wonderful day playing in the room and the pool, and finished off the night with a pizza and root beer float party! This was our first overnight experience and it went so well. 

They had told their therapist that one thing we should know about them is that they always say their prayers before bed.  So when bedtime rolled around we started winding down and going through the motions:
Brush teeth - the littlest one had to gargle and spit 3 times and the oldest
wiped off the counter and inside the sink when they were all done;
Go potty - nothing is funnier than all three boys ringing around the toilet to pee at the same time!; Snuggle/Story/Highs & Lows - The younger two ran over to the bed I was on yelling
"I want to snuggle Mommy!"
(cue me melting again!)
and they loved the book and pointing out their bird, names, and pictures;
and finally prayers. 

I had prayed with the oldest while the other two were bouncing around on the bed but when we turned out the lights, all three boys protested in unison "WE DIDN'T SAY OUR PRAYERS!!"
My hubby reassured them we could pray with the lights off, but they flipped the light back on, all flipped onto their knees on the bed, and did the sign of the cross (Catholic foster father) before the oldest began praying "Now I lay me down to sleep" with the little ones repeating each line after him.  So stinking adorable!

The next morning we soaked up every last minute playing in the pool and room with them and then packed a picnic for the park where they would meet their siblings!  Tears welled up in my eyes as we pulled and I saw my four kiddos waiting excitedly to meet their new brothers.  We introduced them and snapped a few photos together before releasing them to play.  It was so sweet to see how quickly they clicked and played together.  We ate our picnic and played some more before heading back to drop them off.  Our goodbye was not tearful, more so excited for when we would meet again.

We were able to Facetime them Monday and Tuesday and they were excited to see their siblings and a little bit of the house and some of the toys!  Now we are set to head back tomorrow to spend the weekend with them!  Praying the weather cooperates enough to allow us to get down there!

I could write so many details about the boys and the amazing first weekend we spent together, but suffice it to say I am in love with three amazing little guys and I can't wait to spend our second weekend together!!

Two Little Lovebirds

Every minute things get a little more real!  I bought a dresser for the boys' room, got all the car seats in the vehicle, and am working through the rest of the garden harvest to get it into the freezer for when the boys are here!  Today the kiddos and I will take pictures of our home and around town to make photo books for the boys to look through as they are waiting to relocate with us.  We are still working through the full transition plan, but will be meeting them this weekend!!!

Today these got delivered in the mail!!

After we switched to the adoption-from-foster-care path back in March, I had the idea to write a book for the children we would adopt.  I knew we would make a photo book, but wanted more of a story book that showed how our family grew through the years to include them.  In a conference I had attended in April called Empowered to Connect, they had mentioned the importance of families "sticking together" and I immediately thought of the phrase "Birds of a feather flock together".  And so, with the help of clip art from Etsy, this book was created. When we heard about the boys, I added their names and pictures to the book so that as they read through it, they would see themselves, and what kid wouldn't love that!!  The night we found out we had been chosen, I placed an order of 4 books (one for each boy and one for the house) and I am so excited to have them now in hand!!

Click HERE to read Two Little Lovebirds.  *Names and pictures have been hidden for privacy*

Seven

I have 7 children. 

I have 4 sons and 3 daughters. 

I have seven kids, ages 8 and under. 

My 7 kids are all within 6 years of each other. 

My kids are ages 8, 6, 6, 5, 4, 4, and 2.

I've rehearsed how to share our new additions and there is no way to say this that it doesn't sound crazy! 

Crazy awesome, that is! 

The experience of hearing our worker on the phone today telling us that we had been chosen, that we would soon be expanding our family by three, was absolutely indescribable! 

The experience of telling our children that the brothers they have been praying for are actually coming home was even better! Teddy's reaction was literally priceless! Why, oh why, did I not have my phone to video it!?!

So many logistics to coordinate and figure out now, but I am so excited and ready to begin this next chapter! Homme, Party of 9!

Praise God!

Prepared

Yesterday morning, after I got my children ready for school and off on the bus, I had a few moments of peace and quiet to myself. I prayed for the meeting that would begin in a few hours and prayed for God to show me something He wanted me to see when I opened my Bible.  I randomly opened to Ephesians 2 and began reading. After getting through the first few paragraphs, I came to verse 10, a verse I have read before many times, but this time the last words really stood out to me.

God prepared in advance for us to pursue this adoption journey.  As a child, when I watched as my mom's friend brought a little girl, and later her little sister, home from Haiti. As a teen, when I went on a missions trip to Mexico and was able to help with the impoverished children there. Ten years ago, when I met a family at my church in Bemidji that fostered.  When I moved back to Warroad, more families in my church were growing through adoption. When I had my first child, I discovered the MN Adopt website and scoured the list of waiting kids. When we worked in the church nursery in Grand Forks, and we cared for a few foster kiddos during the church service. When we witnessed my sister's family going through their first adoption, and then second and third the following year. Two years ago when a beautiful 11 year old girl on the MN Adopt site stole my heart and we began to seriously discuss adoption. The following year, when we began pursuing a domestic infant adoption. This year, when we changed our path to adoption of a sibling group from foster care. God has been there, stirring our hearts for the needs of children. He has orchestrated every detail that has led us to this point.

Now it was the day we would meet to interview for the placement of the case we have had on our hearts and minds since mid August. The three and a half week communication gap that had happened in September had been the worst. The waiting and wondering were very hard. I had busied myself with cleaning and organizing my house room by room. The inside of every closet, cupboard, fridge, and locker had been emptied and reorganized. Projects we had been putting off got checked off the list. Each room had been thoroughly cleaned, even the exterior windows had been washed. My freezer was filled with meals. I prettied up my menu wall, created my "household helpers" wall, and made nightly bedtime checklists for my kiddos (and yes they are laminated, need you even ask!) Everything that could be labeled got labeled... that laminator really has been working overtime!  All of this to say that God used that window of time that felt excruciatingly long to allow me to physically prepare my home for the visit we were about to have.

My mother, who in case you haven't met her, is nothing short of amazing, took my kids to her house all day Sunday to allow us to finish everything we wanted to prepare and clean, and even fed us supper and bathed our kids there so we wouldn't mess up our freshly cleaned kitchen and bathrooms. All of this led to me sitting down before our interview, peacefully relaxing and reading about how God prepares us in advance for what we are made to do.

At Bible study last week, our pastor shared verses that made you reflect on your purpose: What is your passion; What are your God-given gifts: What are your skills; What breaks your heart?  I left feeling like I needed to "do" something.  Dig into women's ministry, start a youth ministry program, reach out to the community... something.  I knew I couldn't commit to anything with this ongoing adoption process, but it wasn't until I sat down and read this verse that I really understood that this adoption is my purpose.  My God-given gifts are administratively based - hello organization and lamination - as well as compassion.  My skills are organizational and relational.  And it breaks my heart that any child is not living with a family who loves them and is committed to them forever.

The meeting yesterday went very well and time will tell if we will be the family that they move forward with.  Until then, I can rest easy in knowing that God has prepared in advance the path we will walk.